


Lose Yourself

by Harukawa



Series: Nothing Lasts Forever [1]
Category: Elsword (Video Game)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-23
Updated: 2015-03-23
Packaged: 2018-03-19 05:59:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3599028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harukawa/pseuds/Harukawa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With each passing day, Time loses more and more of himself. Arc is the one thing holding him together, even if he knows it’s only a temporary fix.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lose Yourself

**[** _He was wrong. He’d messed up. His calculations had been off and he’d ended up in a different timeline, in another reality. This wasn’t what he’d been working for, wasn’t what he’d been desperately trying to get back to._  


_This wasn’t what he’d wanted._

_His single visible eye grows wide as he realises, as he comes to terms with the fact that all of his research, all of his effort, all of his work... It had all been for naught. Claws of darkness clutch at him as he repeats the same phrase over and over again in his mind. ‘ **I failed. I failed. I failed. I failed.** ’ The phrase crushes him, and he drops to his knees in despair._

_The twisting tendrils of insanity slowly burrow into his mind as he clutches at his head, wondering just how many tries it would take, resolving that he **had** to keep trying no matter what the cost may be. It couldn’t end like this. He couldn’t **let** it end like this._

_The phrase repeats again. Again. Again. Again._

_**I failed. I failed. I failed. I--** _ **]**

He bolts upright, panting heavily as he glances around in a panic. Home. He’s still at home, where he’s living with the other two Tracers. He’s not in another timeline. He hasn’t failed. (And a voice deep in the back of his mind taunts him,  _“No, you haven’t failed **yet**.”_ )

He takes a moment to steady his breathing, one hand held over his pounding heart as the other wipes the sweat off his forehead. A glance at the clock tells him it’s four in the morning, and he can’t help but be relieved to know that the other two would be asleep right now. ‘ _Water.’_ he thinks to himself. ‘ _I need to calm down. I just need a glass of water.’_

He stumbles out of bed, fumbling with his door for a brief moment before making his way down the hall. He can hear Psych’s snores from several rooms away, oddly comforted simply by hearing the normally irritating sound. He can’t hear a single thing from Arc’s room, can only just make out the faint glow of a monitor through the slight crack in his alternate’s door.

He finally makes his way into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and filling it with water from the sink before slowly taking a few sips. His thoughts are still a mess, remnants of his dream swirling about in his mind despite his desperate efforts to forget, to shove them into the darkest corners. (And that voice speaks up again  _“It’s only a matter of time. You know how this will end.”_ ) “Shut up.” He mumbles to himself, trying to will the voice away. ( _”There’s no escaping your fate.”_ ) “Shut up. _Shut up.”_ ( _”You’ll fail. You’ll end up just like he is. That Esper you so despise.”_ ) “Shut up shut up shut up shut up _shut up!”_

He slams his glass down on the counter with more force than he’d intended, shattering it and embedding shards of glass into the palm of his hand. He hisses in pain, does his best to ignore the _laugh_ resounding in his head before that damned voice finally fades away.

“...Time?” He whirls around as another voice speaks his name, eyes widening slightly as he sees Arc standing there, carefully watching him. “...Are you alright?”  


“I’m...” ‘Fine’, he wants to say, but the look on Arc’s face tells him that answer isn’t going to cut it. Just how long had the other been standing there watching him? He lets out a sigh. “...I’ve been better.” he finally mumbles, looking away from Arc.  


“...I can tell.” Arc murmurs, stepping towards him. Time almost flinches away from him, only just managing to keep himself still as the other reaches for his hand. “You’re having nightmares again.” It isn’t phrased as a question, Arc’s keen eyes looking into his own.  


“I... Yeah.” He sighs, shoulders drooping. He watches as Arc starts to pull slivers of glass out of his injured hand, remaining silent for several long moments before finally finding the will to speak again. “...They’re getting worse. More frequent.” His voice drops to a whisper, and he can’t quite hide the fear behind his words. “...Arc. At this rate... I’m...”  


“Shhh.” Arc presses one finger against his lips to silence him, shaking his head. “They’re dreams, Time. They can’t hurt you. You’re not going to end up like that.” He doesn’t need to specify what “that” is, not when it’s a constant fear for the both of them.  


“Arc...”  


Arc silences him again, this time by pressing their lips together in a short, sweet kiss. “...I won’t _let_ that happen to you, Time.” Arc mumbles against his lips, giving him one more brief kiss before pulling away once more. “Come on. I’ll bandage your hand for you, then we can go to bed.” It’s an invitation, one Time intends to take him up on. But not yet, not until he can trust himself again.

“Sure, just... Give me a minute, okay?” Arc gives him a worried look, but eventually nods in response, retreating from the room and leaving Time alone once more.  


A heavy, shuddering sigh leaves him as Arc’s words repeat in his mind’  _‘You’re not going to end up like that.’_

One trembling hand reaches up to touch the eye he keeps hidden behind an eyepatch. He doesn’t have the heart to tell Arc that it’s already too late.


End file.
